Tuesday, March 31, 2015

You're A Memory

I've told you that I'm a hopeless romantic.

Everything that I'm fond of will be treated emotionally. So satisfying yet weaken.

If you happen to be special to me, you'll always be.


Januari 2013

Pernah kau tanya akan gunung yang menghampar di kejauhan sana.
Maka kini, setiap kulihat gunung yang sama, angin seolah membisikkan bait-bait kata yang pernah kau ucap, menelisik ke telingaku.
Aku tersenyum tiap kali kulihat jelas panorama indah bebukitan itu.
Tak hanya karena kehendak Tuhan diciptakan-Nya begitu cantik, tapi juga karena pantulan memori akan kita yang senja itu melintas menatap gunung.

"Aku tak tahu nama gunung itu," jawabku, sederhana saja.

Cheers

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

To Love or To Be Loved

I got a lot of thoughts right now. It is said that a woman's mind is like a ball of string. It's complicated. One thing is attached to another. Our job is connected with our feeling about the future, the future is related to the color of our lipstick, the lipstick issue is overlapped with our crush, and so on, the list never ends. Haha.

It's kind of interesting to think about that. It's funny because it's true. Other says that when a woman says she's going to bed, she's gonna clean the table first, turn off all lamps but necessary, brush her teeth, put a body lotion, comb her hair, and finally goes to bed. While when a man says he's going to bed, the next thing he does is.. actually goes to bed! Lol. Yeah, I think I've seen that thing in my family, among friends, and with former lovers.

And oh, this one is also precious:

How about that, eh, guys?

By the way, this thing makes me think that probably it is different between man and woman when it comes to love. Me and my best friend, Veness, always discuss about it. About how women tend to love easily so it is common--so common that almost become a template--that when a man loves a woman, the woman will eventually loves the man even she probably did not the feel the same at the first time.

This reminds me of another saying that "women are better to be loved than to love because as the time goes, women will able to grow feelings for men, and women will eventually give more than men". It may be true given that women's mind is like boxes or browser tabs that open at the same time. Woman can eventually love someone who loves her because probably with a lot of "sources" available, she can "creates" love.

Let's say that to "create" love, one must needs 5 parts. While women can search all parts needed in all boxes (that connected to each other, remember), men cannot do that because the "mind boxes" of theirs are kept separately. They prefer to open the boxes one at a time, at a different time. So, probably, men have difficulty to "find parts that needed to create love" because basically they can't find them. This is different when a man is the first who falls in love. He simply just opens a box called love, and there it is, a complete set of love, no need to be crafted whatsoever.

Is that makes sense? Well, that's how I imagine it. You can give me other views. I would like to share.

However, though it seems logical to me (all of that mind boxes things), but I still can't fully agree with that saying. It's like a limitation for women to actually choose men who we really love. In other words: women can't be the one who fall in love first. Kind of unfair, isn't it, girls?

That's why when AJ, one of my IELTS teacher, asked the class "to love or to be loved", I chose "to love" because when I love something or someone, I will give almost everything. And I feel free to decide what I'm going to give to it. Not to mention the feeling of satisfaction in all efforts I make. These reasons are above the unconditional love which was the reason my friend gave when he (also) chose "to love". Of course, I want to be loved too, there is a hope to be loved eventually after all the efforts I made, anyway. So maybe that what makes me a hopeless romantic--who fall in an unrequited love so often. Ouch :(

But hey, side of me also suggest that perhaps it is true that a woman should be loved, not to love because woman's mind is definitely different from men's. And that must be a reason for it. Maybe we're designed that way because we're supposed to play different roles, between man and woman. Well, I don't know exactly. Food for thoughts, right? ;)

Cheers!


Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Jatuh Hati

Ada ruang hatiku yang kau temukan
Sempat aku lupakan kini kau sentuh
Aku bukan jatuh cinta namun aku jatuh hati

Ku terpikat pada tuturmu, aku tersihir jiwamu
Terkagum pada pandangmu, caramu melihat dunia
Kuharap kau tahu bahwa ku terinspirasi hatimu

Ku tak harus memilikimu, tapi bolehkah ku selalu di dekatmu

Katanya cinta memang banyak bentuknya
Tapi ku tahu pasti sungguh aku jatuh hati

Kalau kata Venes, dengerin lagu Raisa itu dosa. Kata dia, buat gw yang seleranya cukup hipster, suka lagunya Raisa ibarat sebuah kesalahan sistem. Tapi ya gimana atuh ya, this song is sweet :")

Latest single from Raisa: Jatuh Hati

Cheers!

Sunday, March 8, 2015

I'm A Weirdo

Good evening from Bandung :)

It was an hour ago when I realized that now is already March and I haven't write anything. Tee hee.

Hey, I was going to write about CSR project but then something popped in my head that what if I tell you about the weird side of me?

Dari dulu punya blog, gue selalu menyebut diri sendiri dengan kata "gue". (Oh this is going to be cheesy, but what the hell). Kenapa? Simply because I talk to myself with that word. Gue lupa sih ya dari kapan, tapi ini menarik untuk ditelaah.

Keluarga gue adalah tipe keluarga yang membahasakan dirinya dengan nama. You know, I call myself "Hawa", my sisters called themselves "Yessi" and "Sofi", and so the rest of my big family, both mom's and dad's (kecuali untuk generasi sekarang sih udah pada membahasakan "aku"). Kebiasaan ini kayanya bertahan sampe SD deh. Kemudian pas SMP, gue juga ga inget sih di sekolah ngobrol kaya gimana, tapi kayanya jaman itu gue membahasakan diri dengan "saya", just like the others. Nah tapi, diari gue saat itu pun gue sudah menulis dengan "gw" untuk diri sendiri. Dipikir-pikir, dapet darimana ya referensinya? AADC? MTV? :p

Karena, just so you know, orang Bandung mah tidak biasa menggunakan kata "gue". Tentu saja karena kata itu berasal dari luar Bandung, which is Jakarta. Dan kayanya bagi orang Bandung kadang penggunaan "gue" dirasa tidak sopan lho buat beberapa occasion, well jaman sekarang sih mungkin udah beda.

Masuk SMA, gue yang mainstream, jadi ikutan membahasakan diri pake "aku". Dan kebiasaan itu teruus dipake sampe sekarang. Secara template sih gue akan ngomong "aku" ke siapa pun. Walaupun sekarang di tempat kerja sih gue jadi ber "gw-elu" sama beberapa orang. Maksudnya, kalo orang Jakarta aslinya kan secara template akan ber "gw-elu" dan hanya ke beberapa orang aja yang ber "aku-kamu".

The thing is, gue masih ngerasa aman aja kalau ngomong "aku" sama orang. Kadang gue juga merasa rude untuk pake "gue" ke beberapa orang. But the thing is, since I talk with myself with "gue" dan kalau ada orang yang gue ajak ngobrol dengan itu, gue rasa tuh orang ada sesuatunya deh sehingga gue bisa ngeluarin sesuatu yang mungkin sifatnya inner self. Haha, weird. Hey, I told you this is going to be weird.

Kadang gue suka ngerasa anaknya sarkasme dan jahat kalau ngatain orang sesuatu. Ini mungkin gara-gara gue kebanyakan buka 9gag, tumblr, dan mahfum dengan sinismenya Sherlock (BBC) atau Sheldon (The Big Bang Theory). Jadi bagi gue, kata "gue" = "sarkasme". Contoh paling nyata adalah percakapan dengan sodara gue, Vika. Vika ini anaknya juga jahat kalau ngata-ngatain. Jadi gue dengan mudahnya mengeluarkan kata itu, we even swear a lot. Haha.

One more thing, I also talk with myself in English. Even one time I had dream in English. I think this weird and good at the same time. I don't know. But my IELTS teachers always suggest us to speak English more, get ourselves accustomed to it. Well, I try it everyday since I can remember.

Haha okay, enough with the weird side. But hey, talk about weird and 9gag, there are only few of my friends who browse 9gag and actually laugh on it. So when I find a 9gagger, I'm like "heeyyy, you're on 9gag too. High five, weirdo!". I found that there is too an Indonesian version of 9gag, called 1cak. Not so funny tho.

Aaaaalright. It is getting late. See you on the next (normal) post!

Cheerio!