Vlog: (Hopefully) Going Places

Untuk menutup tahun 2015, gw post vlog waktu ke Taman Safari deh ya ;)

Selamat menyambut lembaran baru, kesempatan baru! Gw gatel sih pengen membahas masalah tahun baru, but let it be the topic of the following post aja deh. Vlog-making ini hopefully mengingatkan gw untuk travel more, do exciting stuff more. Judul blog ini ada alasannya juga kenapa namanya Titania's Travel and Living alias ngarep banyak jalan-jalannya gitu. Mudah-mudahan bisa mewarnai blog ini about places, in addition to me contemplating about life, hehe.

Cheers!

Vlog: Entry 1

So, last weekend I went to Dusun Bambu with my girlfriends and made a vlog about it.

Enjoy my first (amateur) vlog!

Not gonna say much on this post, though. ;p

Cheers!

Romance?

Some of my friends--well, those who have known me for years but never got close--were quite surprised when I told them that my ex and I broke up. Understandable, because me and him were together for more than 5 years and people assumed that this kind of couple would end up in marriage. Early twenty years old of me thought the same. But, life experiences showed me that the future cannot be exactly predicted and life is simply a super-gigantic maze with full of surprises in every turn. The longer we are with someone doesn't mean we know each other well and become an 'other half' to one another. If it doesn't seem right, then it's probably really not okay to be together.

That was the reason why I ended the relationship. They say someone who ends it first is the mean one, the one who gives up, sometimes the one who finds a new one, and then left the other to suffer--either in a short or a long time. Yeah, people will judge anyway. In my point of view, we were neither the angel or the devil. The decision was taken because if the relationship proceeded, it would hurt both of us. Though, he seemed a bit annoyed when I explained why we had to breakup.

But, the fact that he is now with someone new and probably planning to get married soon proofs the consideration. He ditched the feeling for our relationship quickly and apparently I'm an easy thing to be replaced, haha. Or it might be just boys. Either way, judging by some of his "look-at-me-I-have-an-exciting-love-life" photos, I guess he really is happy. And me? I guess this 2015 has been a great time to be alive, to restart my life. Oh, I broke up in early 2015, by the way, on February. Some things has been re-evaluated and started in a good way. Not big things, just baby steps that hopefully lead to my dreams.

Hadiah dari Mei, katanya; "congratulation on being single!" LOL

And am I seeing someone? No. Not something serious, not yet. Well, yeah, crush a bit on someone, but that was it. My boss even set me up with one of his friends and we got out once, but nope. I really don't have a romance business now, you know; the butterflies on stomach, the anxious feeling when he doesn't text for hours, or going out "pacaran" or "malem mingguan" we call it. And how do I do with it? Happy. I'm free as a stallion. Except I'm still the youngest child who lives with her protective parents in Indonesia, I hope you can imagine what kind of "free" I'm talking about, I probably have less freedom than a foal.

What to do after breakup: meet the lovable mayor Ridwan Kamil after a movie night with girlfriends

Also, because I'm an introvert, I do enjoy spending time alone. It gets me thinking; it would be delightful if my next significant other is similar to me, personally. I know that I couldn't get a carbon copy of myself because that would be creepy, but I wish he would enjoy spending quiet time together without being awkward, love to read and write, share the same interests and sense of humor. Well, yeah, of course, he should be a good moslem, mentally and physically healthy, intelligent, and other qualities which I have to improve as well. I'm fully aware that I'm also a bag of failures so the relationship where the two people truly become a positive influence to each other would be lovely. Having someone close who actually talks to the heart in a daily basis is important, apparently, cause I'm a bit antisocial since the breakup. :p

Well anyway, until he comes, I want re-adjust my life. The breakup for me means the start line to get things in place again. To start new, start fresh. I'm currently excited to 'fix' myself so finding someone is not the top priority now. I probably want to cherish this alone time some more because by the time I'm with someone, especially when I get married, I need to be responsible, a mature human being who reduces the time for herself. I think those who already get married are brave, they give themselves to a partnership for a lifetime, I mean, colliding two heads is not easy! But, of course, if you stuck with the right partner, it will be a great journey.

I think it's better to be single than be in a relationship with a wrong piece of puzzle. Anyway, let's find our paths, live it, be good, be happy, and as always, no comparing!

What to do after breakup: become a volunteer in Asian African Carnival

Cheers!

Foolish Baby

Hello, there.

It's been a tiring month that I kept myself away from any activities beside work and application process. What application? Eh, I won't tell it here.

Well, anyway. On November 15, I went to an event held by Telkomsel Loop. Telkomsel is a communication provider in which Loop is one of the programs specialised for youth. Not sure though what the event was titled. It was, by the way, took a place in Trans Studio Mall. There were school performances (angklung, modern dance, fusion dance), coaching sessions about blog writing, music production, and video making (by Panji Pragiwaksono, RAN, and Raditya Dika respectively), and Youtube Broadcast Box--which grabbed my attention to come in the first place.

As the name reveals, it was a soundproof box, size a little caravan, equipped with tools to make a video. So, there were camera, strobe lights, green screen, and some additional accessories (silly hats, oversized glasses, sign board, dummy clapperboard). I was interested because I've been hooking on Youtube and I hoped that this broadcast box with its professional tools could help me to create a video of my own. Ridiculous, I know. But on the other side, I saw this as an opportunity to start my (hopefully) future career as a science communicator. Hey, that's new!

And it was an embarrassing moment, too, to be honest. In fact, I am ashamed to share it with you. But, meh, I'm trying not to care about what people (will) say. The point is I pursued and I tried. The result? As Panji Pragiwaksono mentioned in his coaching session; "the very first piece of your work must be ugly". Inevitably true.

So, here it is:

Why? Well, here's the big picture: I want to deliver science as a fun, relevant, and cool thing.
How? Again, because I've watched too much Youtube videos and I stumbled on some cool science channels, I have a desire to create similar bits since there are almost none of it in Indonesia. Some cool science educational channels in Youtube are AsapScience, VSauce, Numberphile, TedEd, SmarterEveryDay, Veritasium, SciShow, MinutePhysics, and there are more and more, just browse. Lately I found Indonesian version of it, called KokBisa. Although it's not mere science, but it has simple animation and clear explanation on things related to Indonesian. Pretty cool, given that it is run only by students.

I know that I might face a long, complicated journey. I am also aware that I am plain as a day. I took a baby step and I have no idea which path should I take for the future. One thing I know: I want to start. I want to start as a fool. Isn't it the famous quote of Steve Jobs: stay hungry, stay foolish.

Cheers!

How To: Intimidated by Social Media

Remember what I wrote on the previous posts about how miserable I was when I browsed Facebook and saw some friends's "life achievements"?

It always feels like this;

Source

LOL. Dem photo stocks, tho. So accurate.

And remember about the Puppet Master our social survival mammoth tries to please? One of the Puppet Masters is the social media we have these days. Sometimes we're trying to be cool in social media and how we measure the coolness in every photo? We kinda benchmark to celebrities or dem hipster celebrity instagram or just the cool kids we know. But we do not own expensive camera like they do, we do not have a glorious life as they do. And we get depressed and feel bad about ourselves because we're not cool as them. We fail to "please" the Puppet Master.

Or picture this;

(browsing Path) "Wow, she's having a vacation in (an exotic beach)? Damn, I wish I could go there too. If only I didn't get stuck with this exhausting project."

(browsing Instagram) "Huh? He already got himself another girl? What am I doing with my life?"

(browsing Facebook) "Hm, he's leaving for study abroad. Aw, they're hugging. When will I have that moment?"

(browsing whatever social media) "Another baby picture? Give me a break. She's 3 years younger than me and already has kids? My parents would love to see that."

Which one do you have in mind, eh? Don't tell me you never do that.

Well, social media is good to connect with friends, but we are really really have to be careful in using them. We need to be wise. I need to be wise. No more comparing lives. Karena dari membanding-bandingkan lah segala penyakit hati bermunculan.

So, when I found this video, it felt like I was slapped in the face;

I am sure it's not only me. It's like the phenomenon of our generation; smartphone addiction. True that smartphone is "smart" in fetching information fast and easy. But sometimes it has blurred lines in term of "fast and easy". Either it makes us to be productive and actually smart in using it, or it makes us to be fool and wastes our time on it.

Kesimpulannya, dalam menggunakan smartphone dan media sosial, marilah menjadi bijak dan jangan menjadi budak.

Cheers!

Fear of Social Disapproval

Okay, I think my two "the ultimate truth" posts were all about me nagging. There's actually nothing wrong with my occupation. To be able to work in Bandung is wonderful (so do you who work in Bandung, I'm sorry I stated that have a job in Bandung is kinda being like "kaum marjinal"). To be an instructional designer in Pinteraktif is a great opportunity. The doubtful questions actually made up by myself. Well, yes, people do frown when I tell them my job. But they didn't ask why I never made it to big, well-known companies. That were just my social insecurities. I put a lot of people's opinion into account and I'm afraid that I can't satisfy them by not getting "mainstream" life choices.

And I realized that my fear was ridiculous. People don't think about me all the time. People don't think about me as much as I do, or as much as I think they do. They also have battles inside, problems to be solved.

Then I stumbled on this interesting article about why us human have an issue with what other people think of us and how we should minimize it for the sake of our own sanity. It is actually the mammoth who causes it. Damn it, mammoth.

It is quite a long piece of writing (but well worthy!) so I'll try to summarize it for you:

Fear of social disapproval was originated from our ancestors who lived in a small circle of a tribe. To be part of the tribe was everything because they got food and shelter from it. Once you were kicked out from the circle, you would end up attacked by wild beasts or starved to death. It was a long long time ago, yet the trait is still with us today. While civilization has been rapidly growing, human's evolutionary biology can't move nearly as fast. So basically we all have The Social Survival Mammoth lurking inside our brain in this modern life. The mammoths are like; "well, yes, we're craving for social acceptance and admiration, it's 50000 BC after all!"

Social dependent might be relevant in a simple circle back then, but now in a complex and connected world being socially accepted can be very exhausting. Remember when you're trying some clothes and in 3 hours still have no idea on what to wear? On my personal experience, it'll be like;

"Ugh, no.. the last time I wear this they said I was like a grandma."

Or when you're (well, I am) speaking in public:

"Oh no, that man over there is yawning, am I boring? Alright, better skip the joke I made for this section. I mean, a joke? Why would anyone want to hear that? No, hang on, this girl in front of me probably pays attention after all.. look at that wide eyes. Now, what am I talking about? Oh, crap, I forgot. Okay, act cool. Cool is good."

Complicated? Well, that's how my brain works all the time sometimes.

In general, the approval that the mammoth seeks is the one from the Puppet Master. As I quote from the article;

"A Puppet Master is a person or group of people whose opinion matters so much to you that they're essentially running your life. A Puppet Master is often a parent, or maybe your significant other, or sometimes an alpha of your group of friends. A Puppet Master can be a person you look up to who you don'y know very well--maybe even a celebrity you've never met--or a group of people you hold in specially high regard."

Seems familiar? Sure you have one. And in this era of social media, those look-at-me-I'm-fabulous accounts can be part of our Puppet Master. Well. *shrug*

Source

Anyway, the article then reminds us that we should not forget our Authentic Voice (AV). It is the little voice within which tend to be ignored when we're in contact with the mammoth at all time. It is the true voice of you; what you really want, who you really wanna hang out with, what career choice do you like the most. It has ideas, it is the original you. So, it's important to take care our AV to actually stands out and intuitively explore this wide world and.. be you.

The mammoth, by the way, always there with us. It can't be completely wiped out. Human is a social creature, means at one time or two, the mammoth will take place when it comes to socializing.

In my opinion, though, this concept probably similar with habluminallah and habluminannas. Perhaps even more suitable to our needs. Habluminannas is the relationship with other humans, means we should maintain a good relationship with them. As a moslem, I believe in silaturahim, the bond of friendship which, as the Prophet said, lengthens our life and generates fortune. In mammoth case, sometimes it is important to think what people might feel on what we're gonna say, for example, so we don't hurt their feelings.

While habluminallah is the relationship with Allah, with God. Yes, of course, we should take care of our AV. But human is a creature full of nafs (self ego). So, our bias will can interfere with the AV. So, by remembering God, the AV takes healthy dunya-related decisions while it connects with qolbu. I'm stating this because one question tingled me, "how about a gay who assume being gay is his AV?". Well, if one keep the habluminallah, I guess he can somehow suppress it.

Ookay, I'll have to end up this post before it goes off topic. Back to the initial issue, just remember, people are actually ignorant. They are self-absorbed. You don't have to be afraid, Hawa, let's be the best version of yourself, okay? (That's probably my AV talking)

This is NOT how people see you

Cheers!

P.S: I actually enjoy analyzing how people think, why people behave this and that, and how brains work. So, imagine when I watched Inside Out. Amazing piece of analogy. And I didn't cry just because of Bing Bong.

The Edugame Project

Remember when I said that I was going to share my experiences on the earlier years in Pinteraktif? So, here we go:

Where were I? Oh, the Permata CSR project.

As I shared before, on my third month, I moved from LPM in ITB to Pinteraktif office in Batik Agung. Days gone for adapting with new place and colleagues. Until one day my boss phoned me and asked me to join a meeting with PermataBank for a newly briefed e-learning project.

Basically, they (CSR division of PermataBank--professionally, we call them SME which stands for Subject Matter Expert aka the client who holds all knowledge necessary for the e-learning) wanted to make an aid to help their employees in an annually social work. It was a mandatory activity and financial education for children was the current topic then. They already had books, laptops (for read e-books), board games, but they wanted something breakthrough. And apparently an educational digital game was the answer for it.

So, we developed the educational game (edugame for short) from the beginning. We were only given a book from BI (Bank Indonesia) for reference, the client trusted us to construct the whole gamifying thing. I wrote the script and others drew characters, backgrounds, buttons, then animated all together with sprinkles of jolly back sound. It was of course not a short-duration project because it involved a lot of follow-up meetings (means me went back and forth Bandung-Jakarta), revisions, refinements, not to mention the bugs which occurred several times when we (beta)tested it.

Long story short, the edugame was finally ready to be launched. Before all set, me and the team tested it first to local elementary school which was actually owned by my aunt. The aim was to examine kids' response and acceptance to the game.

We had teachers tested it too! (that's my aunt who wears floral hijab)

The game itself was a simple adventure first-person game designed for children aged 9-12. User's accompanied by a key character named Bintang and together they'll explore places and collect points. Each place delivers the financially important topics in a fun way; puzzles, coloring, matching, spot-the-differences.

All and all, what I like about this CSR PermataBank project is the public engagement. I really love seeing people get excited about something I made. I enjoy delivering something fun to public, educating them about something. You may think then I should be a teacher for good. But no, I don't like teaching.

When finally it was released officially by the director of PermataBank, I felt so proud because it was very much appreciated by all. It might not be as grand as national project or something that is politically important, but it's always be my (and of course, Pinteraktif's) significant milestone and portfolio. Oh, and it's featured also in our web, check this out. If you find some similar sentences between this post and that webpage, that's because I wrote the copy for the web. :))

Cheers!

The Ultimate Truth (Part 2)

One time, my friend and I had a chat about confidence. He said 'if he cannot convinces himself first, how can he convinces other?'. We talked about someone that night but I think that sentence is applied to all of us, me especially.

Last post was really an emotional one. Well, in my defense, aren't we all emotional? That's what humans do. The thing is, yes I feel depressed but life goes on. Allah wont test a person beyond his/her capabilities, right?

That motivational poster says it all. That is basically what I am doing right now.

Right, okay. Back to business.

This is a continuation of the truth about my job and how people perceive it and how I cope with it. It came to me that actually it is my family who really need a proper explanation about my job. Because I've been receiving most of doubts from them. My close friends are pretty understand with what I do right now and my not-so-close friends are probably just don't care. But since I can't talk overtly with my family, well yeah, I guess I'll write it down here. It's also for readers who have a slight attention on what I do (saha oge sih haha).

Question #1: "Kok (kerjaannya) gak nyambung sama kuliah?"

Alasan kenapa gw mengambil pekerjaan ini karena gw hobi menulis dan membuat cerita. Walaupun pusat utama seorang instructional designer (idealnya) tidak di bagaimana membangun cerita dan merangkai kata yang indah, tapi dalam prakteknya ranah inilah yang banyak gw pegang sampe tahun ketiga ini--sampai akhirnya selama setahun belakangan gw dibantu seorang copywriter.

Memang pekerjaan ini tidak secara langsung berhubungan dengan mikrobiologi. Tapi, yang gw lihat dan rasakan menjadi sarjana S1 Mikrobiologi lulusan ITB itu bukan hanya bawa bekal ilmunya aja, tapi juga cara berpikir logis yang ternyata nggak semua orang punya. Gw pikir apa yang gw punya ini orang lain juga punya. Ternyata nggak juga. Fokus, bertahan baca materi panjang dan mengolahnya lagi jadi sesuatu yang bisa dipahami, dan detail untuk kualitas ternyata jadi kekuatan gw di Pinteraktif. And I feel grateful for that. Tidak ada yang sia-sia dari kuliah 4 tahun di ITB.

Question #2: "Kok kerja di tempat seperti itu?"

Betul, "kantor" kami bukan gedung tinggi yang indah dengan kerlip lampu mahal. Kantor kami "hanya" berupa rumah kecil yang tidak berada dalam kondisi terbaiknya. I'm sure my dad is the most disappointed person with it because he built a spacious house for a nice living but his daughter works 8 hours a day in a small damp place.

Hal ini sebetulnya juga dirasakan oleh beberapa rekan, nggak cuma gw. Yang kami tahu adalah konsep rumah ini adalah keingininan CEO kami juga. Sengaja konsep rumah karena beliau pengen auranya nyaman dan ga terlalu formal. Fun fact: kebanyakan kantor-kantor "kreatif" di Bandung juga ternyata memiliki konsep yang sama loh. Dan apa yang Pinteraktif punya ini dalam beberapa aspek lebih established kalau dibandingin sama yang lain (dalam pandangan gw). Ini kemudian nyambung sama apa yang gw tulis di post yang sebelumnya tentang melihat sisi kehidupan yang lain. Kondisi ini gw anggap sebagai blessing aja karena nggak semua orang punya kesempatan yang sama. Bahwa jangan melihat rendah sesuatu hanya karena lo merasa lebih baik dari sesuatu itu.

Satu hal lagi, Pinteraktif itu perkembangannya lumayan pesat. Perkembangan dalam hal penambahan karyawan, perbaikan produk dan jasa, jumlah klien, dan bisnis lainnya yang mungkin board of directors yang tahu. Yang selalu gw inget dari Mas Hendi (CEO kami) adalah lini bisnis Pinteraktif ini akan menjadi booming dalam waktu 5 atau 10 tahun dari sekarang. Di jaman internet of things, pendidikan berbasis teknologi akan menjadi tren dan Pinteraktif menjadi salah satu pionir penyedia jasa tersebut. Kami memang belum mencuri spotlight dan belum diliput koran, tapi kami bergerak.

Question #3: "Memangnya susah ya dapet pekerjaan di perusahaan besar?"

Before judging me as a lazy piece of shit, I want you to know that I had applied to many many companies before I decided to take the job as an instructional designer. Details here. Susah dapet pekerjaan di perusahaan besar? Well, ya, tentu saja! Mangga cobain sendiri.

Walaupun gw mengakui sih kalau ada faktor emosional di balik "ketidaksuksesan" memasuki perusahaan besar. As you may know, gw terbelah dua antara kerja dan S2. Hal itu juga yang membuat gw tidak mengerahkan semua kemampuan yang sebetulnya mungkin kalau fokus sih harusnya bisa nembus gitu.

Sekali lagi, ini adalah salah satu blessing yang nggak semua orang dapet. Rejeki temen-temen mungkin di perusahaan besar, rejeki gw di perusahaan start up bikinan alumni ITB yang passionate sama educational technology. I'm not them, they're not me. Stop comparing.

Question #4: "Nggak lanjut sekolah (S2 di luar)?"

Here's a frank answer: yes, I want to study abroad because I want to f- show it off on my social media. Hahahaha *insert evil laugh here*.

Oke, serius. Ya, gw mau sekolah lagi. Ini bukan jawaban wawancara beasiswa sih ya, mind you, this is my personal thought. Pertama, because my dad wants me to. He explicitly said that I should go study abroad before I get married. I'm not the very best of daughter so this is my chance to make him proud of me. Kedua, kenapa pengen di luar karena gw melihat dan merasakan bahwa hidup di negeri orang itu akan luar biasa mengembangkan karakter. Terpapar beragam budaya, menjadi masyarakat global, dan menghadapi tantangan yang mungkin nggak ditemukan di Indonesia yang pada akhirnya membantu kita menemukan diri sendiri *cailah, ngemeng. Ketiga, despite the strength points that Pinteraktif has, it's not all shiny. It has flaws. Dan kondisi itu yang sangat mendorong sebetulnya untuk mendapatkan lingkungan yang lebih baik. Why academic? Why don't you just resign and find other company to work? Silakan lihat alasan pertama. Lol. No, no, I have reasons, of course. Let's not discuss it on this post.

Bonus question: "Ngapain sih di Bandung?"

Ini mungkin lebih ke kekhawatiran pribadi sih. Hanya karena temen-temen gw yang terlihat sukses itu banyak yang di luar Bandung dan gw teh sirik jujur aja lah, jadi ada pikiran bahwa yang kerja (kerja ya, bukan sekolah) di Bandung itu kaum marjinal. Nggak salah juga, karena toh banyak perusahaan besar dan bergengsi ada di luar Bandung, Jakarta dan sekitarnya terutama. Kita ini masih Jakarta-sentris, apa-apa pusatnya Jakarta, apa-apa yang keren itu kerja di Jakarta. Well, gaji juga pastinya lebih besar disana.

Tapi, lihatlah. Keberadaan gw di Bandung ini mungkin untuk menjadi rejeki untuk orang lain. Rejekinya para tukang parkir, rejekinya pedagang baju di Baltos, rejekinya penjual martabak dan kue balok, rejekinya Vika yang gw traktir sushi kemarin, haha. Gw gak mau lanjut nyebutin satu-satu sih karena bukan hal-hal besar juga. Tapi yang gw pahami betul adalah ada sesuatu di gw yang menjadi rejeki bagi orang lain selama gw di Bandung. Juga berada di Bandung ini artinya masih bisa bertemu setiap hari dengan orang tua. That's a privilege. Though it's not all summer days. But, once again, I thank Allah for all of these.

You think I'm making up these reasons just to comfort myself. I don't know. Maybe you're right. But if I can't have a grip hold on myself, who should I rely on? If I can't be confidence with myself, how can I convince other about me? It is tough. Being me is not easy. I'm 10000% sure being you ain't easy as well.

Phew, that was a long reading, wasn't it? There you go, you have my confession, my ultimate truth. Now, let's work to get what we want, people! Semangat!

Cheers!

Hormone Talking

I've been so quiet lately. I rarely talk, even with my family. In that case, I'm not the type of person who easily talk about everything with my family. I know what you are thinking, "family is everything, you should be close to them, emotionally". Well, apparently I don't. Kinda sad and feel different. Well, I've been a different pattern since I was born so I guess it lasts til today. Probably not succeeded (yet) like my two sisters. I'm a mess: a 26 years old girl who still live in her parents house, work in a "questionable place", no decent guy attached to her life (which is also questionable), and still struggling on to get her ass out to study abroad (um, yeah, this is questionable too).

Bitter, I know. I do feel lonely but sometimes I like it this way. I keep life updates, plans, and feels to myself. This is why I blog, honestly. I am talking to myself right now. For you who read it, thank you, you are very kind to reach this sentence.

I probably have to strengthen my faith. Talk to Allah. Pray properly. Because by remembering Him, one will find peace.. is that right? Is it the hormone talking? Yes, it is time of the month, by the way.

Thanks to science, I have a explanation why I am so silent. It's called an introvert (sarcasm). I've taken several psychology tests and the result were similar. The word 'introvert' occurred most of the time. I'd like to elaborate it on my own words, but I feel like I'm emotionally exhausted so if I proceed, it'll be a long babbling.

So, hopefully this helps:

'

Cheers?

The Ultimate Truth (Part 1)

Pertanyaan paling malesin selain "kapan nikah" adalah "kerja dimana". Karena bahkan setelah dijawab pun, pertanyaan masih berlanjut dengan "apa itu?", lengkap dengan kernyitan dahi.

Ya bukan salah mereka juga sih. Karena toh Pinteraktif bukan perusahaan besar kayak tempat teman-teman gw bekerja. The thing is I feel annoyed with that fact. Bahwa dengan itu, orang seperti berkesimpulan (walaupun ini mungkin hanya terjadi di kepala gw aja sih); "kok nggak nyambung sama kuliahnya?", "kok kerja di tempat seperti itu sih?", "memangnya susah ya dapet kerja di perusahaan besar?". Belum kalau yang tahu sejarah keluarga gw, pasti ada celetukan; "nggak mau lanjut sekolah?"

Just shut up. Sorry, I know you guys probably being nice but can we just appreciate what is and not pointing out what isn't? Don't you think I would aware of those questions from the first time I got this job? I mean, yes it is not directly related to my major. Who realized it in the first place? Well I don't know, let's see.. it was me, yay! (That's sarcasm, fyi).

Cukup kesel-keselnya. Itu yang gw rasakan sih selama ini. Tapi, tentu gw punya alasan juga kenapa sekarang masih di Pinteraktif. Bahkan, dalam beberapa minggu terakhir ini mulai bisa melihat hal-hal positif dan menghargai diri sendiri atas apa yang sudah dilakukan sampai tahun ketiga ini.

Apa sih Pinteraktif? Ngapain aja tuh inst-- ins-- insttrurrbussstnel designer?

(My job title is surely a tongue-twisted. It is considered so complex that I can use it for a password. It is instructional designer. We'll get there.)

Pertama, Pinteraktif itu adalah semacam educational technology company. EdTech, you can call it. Bisnis utamanya adalah di teknologi dan bagaimana teknologi (terkini, tentu saja) mengoptimasi proses pendidikan yang sudah ada. Bagaimana caranya? Support kami terletak di 3 bagian; software, hardware, dan konten.

Software kebanggaannya Pinteraktif adalah Pinteraktif Suite, sebuah LMS (Learning Management System) yang dibesarkan seperti anak sendiri (kok kayak iklan kecap). Itu tuh kayak software yang bikin manajemen pembelajaran jadi terintegrasi (nilai, ujian/konten online, bahan materi yang bisa didownload, kuis, jadwal, progress belajar, dsb).

Di hardware, Pinteraktif punya infrastruktur untuk mendukung proses belajar. Ada LED touchscreen yang nyambung sama Smart Podium. Bit tricky to explain this. Gampangnya kayak yang kalian lihat di acara Mario Teguh lah. But it's more than that (takut dijitak sama marketing :p).

Last but not least; konten. Ini adalah wilayah gw. Kami memproduksi konten-konten yang dibutuhin untuk belajar (mostly e-learning). Karena salah satu keyakinan kami adalah learning should be fun, jadi e-learning yang dibikin juga sebisa mungkin menarik. Tim konten menyulap materi yang penuh teks menjadi gambar, cerita, animasi, dan suara.

We have this video for a visual aid. Go check:

Nah, hal yang kedua, si instructional designer (ID) ini bertanggung jawab untuk (ambil napas):
menampung curhatan klien tentang urgensinya bikin e-learning,
menerima dan membaca bahan materi yang panjang (dan seringnya amburadul),
menyaring dan merapikannya sampai bisa dilihat seberapa banyak yang bisa dimasukkan dalam satu konten,
semedi merancang jalan cerita/alur penyampaian yang logis dan bentuk interaktivitasnya,
menyusun dokumen instructional design dan storyline,
mendiskusikannya dengan tim konten,
meeting follow up sama klien (dan mencatat keluh kesah klien; "yang ini kok gitu? saya maunya gini"),
kontrol kualitas skenario dan final content (bawel revisi).

Begitulah kira-kira.

Oke, terus?

Dengan beragamnya kerjaan gw sebagai ID dari hulu ke hilir produksi konten, gw jadi terlibat di beberapa titik krusial. Dan itu menjadikan posisi ini ID ini cukup signifikan di Pinteraktif sehingga kadang gw merasa menjadi ikan besar di kolam kecil. Ini bukan sombong, tapi toh ternyata ini mah memang pengalaman hidup. Lagipula, karena Pinteraktif ini kecil jadi sebesar-besarnya ikan, masih mirip-mirip juga ukurannya. Ibaratnya, kalau beberapa dari kami resign, ketimpangan pasti kerasa banget, karena kami sama-sama punya peran membesarkan Pinteraktif. Dulu, gw bukan mahasiswa cemerlang yang outstanding, so being a big fish in a small pond ini kaya takdir berkata "lu dulu gitu, sekarang cobain gini deh". Dan prinsip itu jadi membuka mata aja, bahwa ada juga loh lapisan kehidupan yang begini.

Gw juga jadi kenal sama orang-orang "kreatif" di Bandung. Pake tanda kutip karena bukan berarti kreatif secara seni tok, intinya sih orang-orang yang dulu pas kuliah sama sekali nggak kebayang bakal kenal. Dan ini membuat gw yang "oh ada yah yang kaya gini di Bandung". Seumur hidup nggak pernah jauh dari radius Bandung Utara dengan ritme sekolah-rumah jadi emang rada cupu :p. Bahwa kemudian gw jadi ikut-ikut acara "ke-Bandung-an" jadi bikin mikir kalau mungkin gw ada di sini sekarang adalah suatu kesempatan melakukan sesuatu untuk kota ini. Jadi bon cabe doang sih, tapi bon cabe di bawah denyut pemerintahan Kang Emil jadi bawa pengaruh beda.

Oke, ini harus segera dibagi dua (whaat, there's more?) sebelum jadi curcol berkepanjangan.

Poinnya adalah gw disini mencoba menjelaskan apa yang sebetulnya gw kerjakan selama ini. And it may not a perfect, "decent", shimmering-gold, spotlight-stealing job, but being not okay is okay, you know? Life is all about imperfection. Tugas manusia kemudian: pertama, bersyukur atas apa yang dimiliki; kedua, terus mencari cara agar apa yang dimiliki menjadi lebih baik dan lebih baik.

The creative director, instructional designer, and illustrator

Part 2 akan menggarisbawahi bagaimana gw (pada akhirnya) mengatasi segala pertanyaan-pertanyaan annoying itu. Bear with me. ;)

Cheers!

Family Goal

Hi!

You fellow 9gagers must have known a GIF that shown an over enthusiastic girl who breaks a glass plate (I don't know, is it a glass?) when she and her family are celebrating new year. I was surprised and I thought she was really that hyper active and the parents were really astonished of her daughter's act.

Turns out it's staged for their Vine video. Again, I found this from someone's shared link in Facebook (I didn't even care remember who shared this, lol). They called themselves Eh Bee Family, and they're all that comical and amusing. Check out their Vine compilation:

As you see, I think the mastermind of these acts is the father. I mean, just look at that face :)). Good thing that he got a wife and kids who are as humorous as he is. And I love how they are cooperated with each other. A wonderful funny family coming to my bucket list!

Cheerio!

Feed Your Brain

Cool shelf! Future husband, can we get one? Source from here

If you, by chance, find my Facebook page and see nothing but tagged photos, that's because I keep it that way since ages--guess I've stopped updating Facebook since 2012. But I'm not entirely inactive. I almost sign in Facebook every day. It's the media where I can observe some of my friends' life achievements which end up make me miserable about mine and not displaying any response to it. I like to be invisible, a judgemental silent reader. But, I think the foremost reason why I sign in to Facebook on a daily basis is because I can find some interesting links (news and updates) which my friends shared. Some are stupid, some are hilarious, but there are considerably number of enlightening information too.

From the links they shared I did an "exploration" and found the official homepage of the information bits. I simply wanted to know what kind of website that hosts this interesting topic. So I found I fucking love science (damn cool the name!) and Vox. Later on, I also found New Scientist and Futurity. These add my reading list after TED (both TED Talks and TedEd). Beside the websites surfing on my (office) desktop, I sometimes read articles in Flipboard science section on my tablet (I chose style, home, travel, film, and celebrity to appear in my homepage Flipboard, aside from science, though).

What I am going with this is that sometimes I read too much I can't write. Haha, that's just an excuse. No, I mean, it is important to keep myself, yourself, ourselves--to feed our brain as often as we feed our stomach. I don't know how to put it because now part of my brain is booing me because I may be wrong (considering some readers' response). But for me, personally, I do it to keep me sane. To keep my brain well-fed. To maintain to not stupid while I entertain myself. And I'm pretty much enjoy myself who love to seek some new knowledge, and science is a part of it.

Nerd? Good.

Weird? Brilliant.

Oh, and what I wanted to share with you is that just minutes ago, I found an article titled Scans Map The Brain As People Read Harry Potter.

Interesting fact number one is the technology can be used in the future to know what exactly the problem in one's brain with dyslexia, stroke, or learning trouble. Interesting fact number two is (wait this is what I implied, not stated in the article) reading is paramount. It activates a lot of brain cells to comprehend something we read, as I quote from the article: "Those findings suggest how words are integrated into memory--how the brain first visually perceives a word and then begins accessing the properties of the word and fitting it into the story context.".

Source

That is one of the reasons why this year I'm excited for "a book a month" project. So far it has been going pretty well. This is, like, the first year I actually read a book a month and that feels really good. I want my future children to be smart. Since intelligence is inherited from the mother, I'm responsible to not make myself stupid in order to produce clever offspring. Aaand, of course, their father should be intelligent too so he can teach and show them profound life values.

Ookay, that was a long rambling passage. 

Here's a point: I do realize that there are many kinds of intelligence. I'm maybe good at linguistic and existential, but very sloppy in logical and intra/interpersonal intelligence. I guess the best thing for us is to embrace and maximize it as long as we live. Those what I wrote about is simply my way to add and sharpen my existing knowledge of science. Go find yours. ;)

Cheers!

Be Reminded

Ada beberapa ayat Al-Qur'an yang pengen gw post disini sebagai self reminder aja.

Q.S Thaha: 130
"Maka bersabarlah engkau (Muhammad) atas apa yang mereka katakan, dan bertasbihlah dengan memuji Tuhanmu, sebelum matahari terbit, dan sebelum terbenam, dan bertasbihlah (pula) pada waktu tengah malam dan di ujung siang hari, agar engkau merasa tenang."

Interpretasi naif gw ini adalah perintah untuk sabar menghadapi apa kata orang. Caranya gimana? Sebutlah nama Allah di waktu-waktu yang ditentukan: solat. Nggak eksplisit nyebut subuh, dzuhur, ashar, magrib, atau isya. Tapi kita tahu dengan keterangan waktu-waktu di atas itu kurang lebih adalah solat 5 waktu plus tahajud.

Q.S Thaha: 131
"Dan janganlah engkau tujukan pandangan matamu kepada kenikmatan yang telah Kami berikan kepada beberapa golongan dari mereka, (sebagai) bunga kehidupan dunia agar Kami uji mereka dengan (kesenangan) itu. Karunia Tuhanmu lebih baik dan lebih kekal."

Ini untuk mengingatkan gw bahwa jangan lihat kesenangan orang kemudian ngebanding-bandingin sama kesenangan sendiri. Apalagi di sosmed. Karena toh kesenangan juga adalah ujian.

Q.S Thaha: 132
"Dan perintahkanlah keluargamu melaksanakan salat dan sabar dalam mengerjakannya. Kami tidak memberi rezeki kepadamu, Kamilah yang memberi rezeki kepadamu. Dan akibat (yang baik di akhirat) adalah bagi mereka yang bertakwa."

Kalau ini reminder bahwa solat itu memang nggak gampang loh, bagi gw pribadi ya. Belum bisa tepat waktu, karena kalau lagi di tengah-tengah kegiatan sesuatu gitu pasti tanggung: "nanti 15 menit lagi". Jadi, memang harus bersabar. Gw menganggap bahwa sesuatu yang diperintahkan sabar itu adalah sesuatu yang emang bukan main-main dan nggak gampang, salah satunya ya solat. Bersabar artinya, bersabar menunda pekerjaan dulu karena sudah waktunya solat. Bersabar untuk berhenti nonton atau ngobrol karena sudah waktunya solat. Bersabar kalau lagi solat, pikirannya jangan pengen cepet-cepet beres gara-gara gak mau ketinggalan gosip, misalnya. Overall, berjuang dalam sabar karena ini adalah untuk mencari ridho Allah juga Sang Pemberi Rezeki.

Q.S Al-Anbiya: 35
"Setiap yang bernyawa akan merasakan mati. Kami akan menguji kamu dengan keburukan dan kebaikan sebagai cobaan. Dan kamu akan dikembalikan hanya kepada Kami."

Sudah jelas: Kami akan menguji kamu dengan keburukan dan kebaikan sebagai cobaan. Another statement bahwa kebaikan pun adalah suatu cobaan. Kan ayat itu nggak menyebutkan bahwa "menguji dengan keburukan sebagai cobaan". Tapi, keburukan plus kebaikan adalah satu paket cobaan.

Q.S Al-Anbiya: 37
"Manusia diciptakan (bersifat) tergesa-gesa. Kelak akan Aku perlihatkan kepadamu tanda-tanda (kekuasaan)-Ku. Maka janganlah meminta Aku menyegerakannya."

Ini pengingat banget: "nah lu tuh suka buru-buru, wa!". Wajar sih karena sifat manusia diciptakan begitu, tapi bukan untuk dipelihara manja, melainkan untuk dimanfaatkan bijak. Jadi inget masalah nikah. Atau apa pun lah yang suka ditanya orang kalau basa-basi. Bisa aja kan ada kasus: "iih pengen cepet nikah" terus orang tersebut berdoa: "ya Allah, mudah-mudahan aku cepet nikah". Ya gw juga mau sih nikah, tapi nggak doa gitu kok, beneran :p. Maksudnya, Allah juga tahu kok waktu yang tepat buat kita untuk akhirnya mampu mengemban rezeki yang selama ini kita minta.

Kalau ada yang sama-sama merasa diingatkan, alhamdulillah. Tapi insyaallah tujuannya ini sih untuk pengingat pribadi aja. Sebelum akhirnya ketumpuk sama jumbled information on my brain. ;)
Oh, ada lagi sih ayat yang pengen gw share. Al-Anbiya juga (currently recite it), tentang penciptaan bumi, I guess. I'll share on the next post.

Cheers!

You Look Like My Next Mistake

I was scrolling on my Path timeline and suddenly found photo of my ex-crush aka someone who sent a rejection message by sending no message at all this early June and I am still trying to get over him lol and I was speaking to myself:

"Look at that face. You look like my next mistake. Yeah, that's what I should've said the first time I saw you."

And I was like, *gasp*

I literally recited Taylor Swift's Blank Space while I had no intention to sing at all.

Oh my God, now Blank Space is a complete sense to me.

I FEEL YOU, TAYLOR SWIFT.

Laugh Like An Idiot

I have a lot of spare time. Even in the office. I get bored easily and the only way to entertain myself while pretending to work is browsing Youtube.

Youtube is kind of my playground. I mean, imagine, I can actually find everything in it. Google is of course the ultimate search engine, but when I want to understand something quickly (because I'm a visual person), then Youtube comes in handy. I can watch news, listen to some music, watch inspiring talks and videos (Ted Talks, for example) and of course laugh at silly things.

My current fav channels on Youtube for laughing my ass off (alias ketawa bego) is Pewdiepie and Edho Zell. Idk guys, but for me they're hilarious.

I knew Pewdiepie from Rendy, my former office friend. He used to play some games in the office (at lunch break and after hour) which apparently had stories on my liking: Sherlock Holmes (forgot the real title), The Evil Within, Outlast, Outlast: Whistleblower, DreadOut, and Daylight. I loved watching Rendy played it because I was too coward to play those horror games by myself, haha. But I was excited to follow the story, especially Outlast series (like, best horror game ever!). One time Rendy talked me about a guy whose reaction is always funny towards the game he plays. He typed Pewdiepie on Youtube search and yeah this guy is pretty much yell and swear at everything, haha.

Here, take a look when he played Surgeon Simulator. My, the game itself is stupidly hilarious:

From his videos, I have watched some amazing games, like The Last of Us, Beyond Two Souls, Heavy Rain, Life is Strange, Infamous: Second Son, and Fahrenheit: Indigo Prophecy. All are story-oriented games, I mean, Pewdiepie also plays other games too like Mortal Kombat, GTA, horror and some random funny games. But those are my favorite, as you can tell, due to its good story. Well, what's funny in Pewdiepie is his sarcasm, swear, and 9gag-ish jokes which gets me everytime. He has became my daily dose of laughing since January this year.

The second channel is the one that I found just recently, about 3 days ago. He's one of Indonesian Youtubers who posts funny parody and sketch comedy. Usually I found them as boring and cheesy, but this Edho Zell guy is somehow spontaneously original and amusing.

Here's him doing parody of Syahrini:

I found his channel from Dagelan's instagram, an absurd comedy compilation that most of Indonesian can relate. Last Wednesday night I watched almost all his videos and probably scared neighbors by laughing in the middle of the night. I think parody is funny because it's true. Go check Sacha Stevenson's Youtube channel too that depicts how (most of) Indonesian behave on her "How to Act Indonesian".

So, yeah, those are my escape from routine at the office or just simply one of ways to.. laugh like an idiot whenever I need. :)))
What's yours?


Cheers! 

:')

"You know what you should do? Get a scholarship in England, Hawa."

"I've tried, really."

"Don't give up then. It takes hard work and huge amount of effort. But it's well worth it in the future. The pain is only temporary, the victory is everlasting. Jeez, how cool was that, haha, I just made my own quote."

"Hahahaha, I was just typing that I should write your words on top of Big Ben picture, print it, and frame it."

"Hahaha, I'm flattered. Maybe I should make a living from making quotes. Right, that would be a good career choice."

"Yeah, you should."

You, narcissistically funny guy. Thanks for have crossed my path for a while. :')

Healing A Wound

Everybody has a scar.

Some prefer to hide it. Some write it into a cheesy poem. Some sing it. Some heal it with pray and happiness. Any way, we are walking pass each other without knowing the real struggle inside.

We are all imperfect. Smile over the pain. Live over the tears.

I wrote it 3 days ago in the morning at office. Feel a bit broken-hearted back then, haha well not really about "love", but yes a bit broken. My self-esteem somewhat dropped at that time. You know, the time when you feel vulnerable and unwanted.

But then I realized that everybody might be feel the same way, with a different issue.. that everybody is struggling inside, hiding the pain with smile and laughter.

I do that recently. There is a chaos in my mind (probably due to the woman jumbled-boxes-mind thing that I wrote on the previous post :p), a battle to categorize and finish every tasks. Sometimes I feel so alone and broken. But life goes on, I have to function as human, means I have to do daily routine, I have to socialise, I have to do this and that. And some of the things that bumped to me along the days, weeks, and months can lift and cheer me up--which is nice. :)

So, Hawa, you may be feel bitter in the morning (or night, depend on the event :p), but eventually you will feel better.

It is true the stimuli of both physical and emotional pain is processed in the same way in the brain. Basically our brain cannot distinguish which wound is physical and emotional because both are coded in one language: "hurt". What I'm trying to say that an emotional pain is like a physical damage, that finally recovered as the time goes.

Well.. that's what life all about, eh? :)

Oh iya, satu lagi, hampir lupa. Karena tadi pagi juga felt miserable about moving on (oh God no, it's not about my break up) and then my best friends from Hayang Nyingkah United comforted me with these golden words:

Kalo kata Veness: "Yakin aja sama apa yang udah dipilih. Soalnya mau milih mana juga pasti ada resikonya."

Kalo kata Mei: "Yang tidak mudah dari N salah satunya memang ini, tapi untuk itulah kita bikin U, biar sama-sama menguatkan dan H kita akhirnya tercapai."

Yes, Hayang Nyingkah United (HNU) is a Whatsapp group. Dibuat karena kami bertiga memiliki visi misi yang sama (you Sundanese probably can guess it easily :p). Sori advice-nya Mei emang rada decoded hahaha, typical Mei. :))

Cheers!